TIARA
by jnharrow
Summary: Another response for Dee at Perfectly Plum. Same challenge.


_I don't own JE's characters and I'm not making any money from this story._

_Week 21 - Dee's Tiara Challenge _

_Use one or both of the following prompts: (1) What you really need to go with that is a tiara. _

_Dee - I kinda cheated…_

**TIARA **

**by jnharrow**

"What you really need to go with that is a TIARA," said the man hovering at my shoulder, his voice raised just enough to reach me over the din of the busy convention center.

I jumped away from the concept car display I'd been standing by and whirled to face him. "Excuse me?" I glanced down at a variation of my standard uniform which today consisted of well worn jeans and an ancient, black Metallica concert tee. Not exactly an outfit that calls for upscale head jewelry.

"A TIARA," the red-haired, skinny man repeated patiently, smiling widely.

"Uh-huh." I began backing away slowly. I stuck one hand in my purse, but I was pretty sure my stun gun lacked juice.

A panicked look flashed across his face, "No, no. A Target Initiated Automatic Reactive Array. TIARA. See?"

Oh. He wanted to sell me something. Ha. He wouldn't look so upset at a possible lost sale if he knew who I was and could magically see my bank balance.

He pushed closer, his freckled face enthusiastic as he babbled something about cars and aftermarket built-in bomb detection . Like there was before market bomb detection. There wasn't, was there?

Wait.

He obviously did know who I was.

Oh well, still poor here. Too bad for him.

I grabbed his tie and gently pulled him lower so I could get his attention. Also to stop the spewing techno-babble, which was giving me a headache. When he caught his breath, I said, "See that guy over there?" I pointed. "All in black? Surrounded by other big guys, also all dressed in black?"

He nodded as best he could, eyes wide, blue and confused.

"Ok, offer him this TIARA thingy." He still looked nervous, so I said matter-of-factly, "He handles all of my car security." I released his tie and gave him an encouraging shove in the right direction. "Go ahead. Go get 'im!"

He looked back at me once, still unsure, but proceeded on the course I'd set for him and ended up face-to-face with Ranger. Huh, Ranger didn't look too happy at being interrupted. Go figure. He had that scary 'I can't decide whether to send you to a desert or jungle third world country' look on his face. Poor little sales guy. He didn't look like he liked either option. Who knew little sales guys could have such good ESP that they could read a Ranger look? Go little sales guy! Except, maybe that look was kind of self-explanatory.

I shrugged.

Wow, he's brave, though. I could see his lips moving and the exact moment when he started his TIARA thingy pitch to Ranger. Cool! I've never seen Ranger look that incredulous. I filed the look away for future reference under Ranger Expressions: surprise, sheer disbelief.

Little sales guy should really explain that acronym before he starts his pitch. This was clearly a learning experience.

Uh-oh. That was fun, but little sales guy looked terrified now. Maybe sending him to Ranger wasn't a fitting punishment for making my head hurt. Probably I should help him out.

I laid my hand on Ranger's fist which was bunched in little sales guy's shirt. "Uh…I think there's been a misunderstanding," I said.

Ranger had his blank face back, I noted as he turned to look at me. "Babe?"

"Yeah, he's trying to sell you a Terribly Ineffective Aftermarket Reacto…what was it again?" I asked little sales guy.

Ranger loosened his fingers, slowly letting go of the man's shirt.

"Ah--a--" little sales guy gulped but managed to spit it out, "Target Initiated Automatic Reactive Array. The next revolution in vehicle bomb detection." His voice finished on a squeak, but I thought he did pretty well, considering. "She said you handled her car security."

Ranger looked at me. I could see the tiny creases around his eyes and the ever so faint hint of warmth in their depths that meant I was amusing him. He reached for his wallet and handed little sales guy a business card. "I might be interested. Send me the specs," was all he said.

Dismissed, little sales guy looked torn between jubilation at not being completely shut out, still being alive and residing in the United States, and irritation at the suspicion that he'd been set up somehow. He shot me an accusing look before he retreated, which I returned with an innocent one of my own. Hey, I couldn't have predicted that misunderstanding.

"Babe."

I turned the innocent look on Ranger.

He didn't buy it either.

I scrunched up my nose at him. "I was bored." My stomach chose this time to growl, loudly. "Also hungry."

"I told you we could go to lunch soon," Ranger said, shaking his head at me, still almost smiling. "Let's go feed the beast." He placed his hand at the small of my back and guided me through the milling crowd. Oh sure, for him they part like he's Moses, for me it's all elbows and excuse me. I gave them all a dirty look.

This was the last time I was going to a security convention with Rangeman. They could go buy bat toys on their own next time.


End file.
